the old me

well since you have been gone i have done things i have never done before. i felt heartbreak for the first time i didnt know how to handle it. i started of not eating anything for days i cried myself to sleep. i scream you name when no one was around i literally wanted to die because you werent in my life. i thought to myself daily he's gone he will never think of me he will never give me one chance to show him how much i cared for him. i got worse by day and even worse at night. my dreams taunted me i never wanted to sleep. i wanted to be by myself i didnt talk i keep to myself. wept with sorrow pain and regret. if i would have noticed how much you ment then i would have stayed and we would still be the it couple and the one that made us special. but im glad we broke up because it brought me closer to myself . im the  girl i was four years ago i came to oskie trying to change who i was so that people would like me so that the girls wouldnt judge me. when i was trying to hard to be someone else i completly lost who i was. she had left and thanks to my ex boyfriend i found the old me again. im the girl that cared for everyone no matter what was wrong i was there to help. im the girl that stepped out of her way to help others. and most importantly its not all about me. yes there are a few days that are just for me but most of the time its for others. this girl can live without a guy and wont find one if someone cares enough for me they will find me. and since im single i am enjoying life by the day. i have remembered what i was fascinated by. and that is being out doors looking at the stars watching sunsets smilings and shopping what girl doesnt like shopping. im a completly different girl and im proud to finally say its me and thats never going to change again. so for everyone to here this is the Olivia everyone used to know. and thanks to christopher he has brought her back wether he is still here or he disowns me like he did. you still brought me back and if a guy finds me he will never wanna let me go because im one of those girls that well you just gotta know me to find out. so thanks christopher for being an ass and telling me to loose your number and that i did wrong and that you were never as happy as you are now. because those words are the ones i remember so that i can not talk to you. even though i still miss you i love you
P.S I LOVE YOU SO  MUCH WAITING FOR YOU TO KEEP YOUR PROMISES